As a young man
I took a chance
to step outside of time
and I’ve been here ever since
Watching life go by
from this riverside
I nod and smile
and wonder why
the tides feels uninviting
Sink or swim
if I jump in
I’ll loose my place
in nowhere
And all I’ve seen
behind the screen
will wash away
completely
What loss do I gain
and how different the pain
if I take a few steps forward
I’ll never know
from beside the flow,
I must let go to learn it
“Cradle me
I am infant
once again.
I've forgotten all
I thought I knew”
The last page of “Providence”
sealed my fate
I wonder if I never said it out loud
if I would have spent the past 5 years
watching everything I’ve collected
release itself from the stranglehold
of my chosen identity
Moments and memories made
that made me, me
have made me look harder in
the mirror and check for the wrinkles, marks and smile lines that
let me know things did happen
and I’m not just walking backwards
through daydreams
I know who I’m looking at
and he knows he’s being seen
which is where we both agree
to meet when the vision for what’s next
is blurry uncertain
What we know now
is that we can’t know it all
but we can let the self evident truths
reveal themselves in time
to be collected and shared between
everyone else we meet along the way
and find how quickly we can sense
they know what we know
without the need to speak or use irresponsible reflective wordings
In these moments
silence and a smile
says more than
all the volumes of literature
in every library on earth
“I like
to think
I think
I know
And yet
I know
I don’t”
I know that most of you wont care
but I have actually gone through the process
of building this entire site myself
16 year old me,
knowing that I can create a full
online store
with the ability to distribute
all of my creative things in one place,
would absolutely lose his mind
This is the first post I'm creating from the new site and
I am THRILLED
First think in the morning
I'm tireddesire is firing
tires turnlast nights sights burned
Set up the day
before I get up.
Get going -
find a way
to play
and get paid
The fun is freedom
the bills are chains
that keep me from
floating away
Am I moving on?
Coming back
to where I'm at nowhappens wherever I am
Rise and fall
book endagain and again and -
Below is a list of George Gurdjieff's rules for life as that I learned from that book "The Spiritual Journey of Alejandro Jodorowsky". Gurdjieff was a philosopher, mystic, spiritual teacher, composer. Jodo, among many things, is an incredible film director and deeply profound collector and expresser of ideas.
This is an interesting list. Enjoy the read and see what sticks!
Listen to Gurdjieff's music while reading if you'd like:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Ly47LcK0S4
1. Ground your attention on yourself. Be conscious at every moment of what you are thinking, sensing, feeling, desiring, and doing.
2. Always finish what you have begun.
3. Whatever you are doing, do it as well as possible.
4. Do not become attached to anything that can destroy you in the course of time.
5. Develop your generosity – but secretly.
6. Treat everyone as if he or she was a close relative.
7. Organize what you have disorganized.
8. Learn to receive and give thanks for every gift.
9. Stop defining yourself.
10. Do not lie or steal, for you lie to yourself and steal from yourself.
11. Help your neighbor, but do not make him dependent.
12. Do not encourage others to imitate you.
13. Make work plans and accomplish them.
14. Do not take up too much space.
15. Make no useless movements or sounds.
16. If you lack faith, pretend to have it.
17. Do not allow yourself to be impressed by strong personalities.
18. Do not regard anyone or anything as your possession.
19. Share fairly.
20. Do not seduce.
21. Sleep and eat only as much as necessary.
22. Do not speak of your personal problems.
23. Do not express judgement or criticism when you are ignorant of most of the factors involved.
24. Do not establish useless friendships.
25. Do not follow fashions.
26. Do not sell yourself.
27. Respect contracts you have signed.
28. Be on time.
29. Never envy the luck or success of anyone.
30. Say no more than necessary.
31. Do not think of the profits your work will engender.
32. Never threaten anyone.
33. Keep your promises.
34. In any discussion, put yourself in the other person’s place.
35. Admit that someone else may be superior to you.
36. Do not eliminate, but transmute.
37. Conquer your fears, for each of them represents a camouflaged desire.
38. Help others to help themselves.
39. Conquer your aversions and come closer to those who inspire rejection in you.
40. Do not react to what others say about you, whether praise or blame.
41. Transform your pride into dignity.
42. Transform your anger into creativity.
43. Transform your greed into respect for beauty.
44. Transform your envy into admiration for the values of the other.
45. Transform your hate into charity.
46. Neither praise nor insult yourself.
47. Regard what does not belong to you as if it did belong to you.
48. Do not complain.
49. Develop your imagination.
50. Never give orders to gain the satisfaction of being obeyed.
51. Pay for services performed for you.
52. Do not proselytize your work or ideas.
53. Do not try to make others feel for you emotions such as pity, admiration, sympathy, or complicity.
54. Do not try to distinguish yourself by your appearance.
55. Never contradict; instead, be silent.
56. Do not contract debts; acquire and pay immediately.
57. If you offend someone, ask his or her pardon; if you have offended a person publicly, apologize publicly.
58. When you realize you have said something that is mistaken, do not persist in error through pride; instead, immediately retract it.
59. Never defend your old ideas simply because you are the one who expressed them.
60. Do not keep useless objects.
61. Do not adorn yourself with exotic ideas.
62. Do not have your photograph taken with famous people.
63. Justify yourself to no one, and keep your own counsel.
64. Never define yourself by what you possess.
65. Never speak of yourself without considering that you might change.
66. Accept that nothing belongs to you.
67. When someone asks your opinion about something or someone, speak only of his or her qualities.
68. When you become ill, regard your illness as your teacher, not as something to be hated.
69. Look directly, and do not hide yourself.
70. Do not forget your dead, but accord them a limited place and do not allow them to invade your life.
71. Wherever you live, always find a space that you devote to the sacred.
72. When you perform a service, make your effort inconspicuous.
73. If you decide to work to help others, do it with pleasure.
74. If you are hesitating between doing and not doing, take the risk of doing.
75. Do not try to be everything to your spouse; accept that there are things that you cannot give him or her but which others can.
76. When someone is speaking to an interested audience, do not contradict that person and steal his or her audience.
77. Live on money you have earned.
78. Never brag about amorous adventures.
79. Never glorify your weaknesses.
80. Never visit someone only to pass the time.
81. Obtain things in order to share them.
82. If you are meditating and a devil appears, make the devil meditate too.
Same path
same people
same faces
I don't see much newat these spots
recycled conversations
and stale hello's
inspiration used to flow
with no end
and now i'm only distracted by
the very thing that used to ignite me
it might be time to hit the road..
explore the unknown
to find what i want to findthat's still unknown to me
or, maybe i just need to
dig deeper?
Information these days is cheaper than dirt.
Most of it is silt,
destined to wash away
with the first rain
of the season
Some is clay,
useful to the craftsman
who is willing to take the time
to work with it,
bend it into shape
and test it's worth in
the flames of the furnace
There are sands,
rocky mixes,
mirages in the distance
and rich soil within whichto strive for strong roots.
Plant a seed
in any of these containers
but expect not growth in all
Vapid trash that fills the webwill drown trye thoughts in waste
Nutrient dense
ideas and expressions
please satisfy my taste
I find myself do everything but
the work I need to be doing
Building tools I'll maybe use
in hopes it sparks some sense
of creativity that couldn't be born
anywhere else except on a blank canvas
that I made with my own two hands
and half a brain
The other half has been fully dedicated
to the processing of miscellaneous information
that is algorithmically fed to me
by an auto-populating and never ending
stream of primarily useless videos
There is still hope,
hope that one of those videos
will show me something useful
that I can use as a jumping off point
to begin creating the next best way
to waste my time